Slimming World Update # 10

 It's been a very long time since I've done a Slimming World update, basically before the summer began. A lot has gone on and I've got a lot to fill you in on so grab a cuppa and get yourself comfy for my rollercoaster summer.

I lost all motivation when I came back from university. I'd gain quite a bit of weight over the exam period about half a stone from my lowest ever weight. I wasn't back up at my starting weight but I knew it wouldn't take much to get back there. I was dipping in and out of slimming world but my heart wasn't in it. I'd eat well and on plan meals but I'd just want to stuff my face with naughty snacks which I mostly did do. I ended up getting really down on myself, hated how I looked again and had no one to blame for myself.

For most of the summer I was losing and gaining the same five pounds. It was ridiculous and I was paying £4.95 a week just to be getting myself worked up about not losing weight or gaining weight. Even when I was being really good I was still gaining or maintaining. The end of August quickly rolled around and so did my trip to Disneyland Paris, I wanted to be down to 10 stone before this trip and I ended up being at the top of the 10 stone bordering 11 stone on the scales. I didn't let it get me down though and I went on my trip wore shorts, I walked around not caring what people thought and I finally felt a bit like my old self. I ate what I wanted without worrying about the scales, stuffed my face with croissants and pain au chocolates, ate ice cream and doughnuts and cake. It was weird. For the first time since I joined Slimming World I didn't think about what I was eating and my daily 5 - 15 syn allowance.

Coming back from Disney the dreaded scales were ready to greet me and surprisingly only showed a 3 lb gain from a five day trip of eating whatever I wanted without worry. I did what everyone does once they get back off of holiday to get straight back onto plan. I honestly did have good intentions to do this but I fell on the first hurdle and didn't. It was out of laziness, I'd be good all day then for dinner I'd be hungry and wouldn't want to cook so would have a pizza from the freezer or whatever my mum was cooking. I'd tell myself every day that tomorrow I'll get back onto plan. Well like always, tomorrow never came.

Roll on a few weeks of not really caring what I ate. I had takeaways, lots of cheese, chocolate and crisps, you name it I probably had it. I thought enough was enough, I am going back to university next week and I don't want to get myself back where I started. Sunday 18th rolled around, I weighed myself in the morning and surprisingly was at the weight I was before I went to Disney. It was the push I needed. I'm still miles away from where I want to be but I know I can do it. It's now Monday night and I've just completed my second day completely on plan and you know what? I feel amazing. I have a whole new lease of motivation and literally cannot wait to get back to university and continue to stick to plan. Last year I think I put too much pressure on myself and didn't enjoy second year as much as I should've. This year I'm going to drink wine when I want to, have a takeaway or go out for dinner every now and again but I'm not going to beat myself up about it, life is too short at the end of the day.

I have also decided to do Slimming World from home without the online subscription. I've realised now I have my timetable for next year that getting to group is not really possible and to be honest I know the plan, I've done it for over a year and I know what I need to do. My mum is still at target and I know she'll be able to help me and stock me up on HiFi bars when I crave them. I feel by not going to group I can have a naughty night or two and not have to worry about the judging I'm going to get at group when I gain a couple of pounds a couple of weeks in a row. At the end of the day the scales just show a number and they don't show how you feel within yourself and they don't show the amazing night out you had with your friends to warrant that pound or two gain. It's all about balance and I feel not going to group and doing Slimming World by myself is going to be the best thing for me.

I am still going to stick to plan as much as possible but I'm not going to be so strict on myself. One of the girls I'm living with this year actually started Slimming World from home during the summer so hopefully we will both be able to help and motivate one another throughout the year.

So here's to a new adventure and the start of my new weight loss journey, a flexible journey.

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